ALL BACK TO NORMAL....

Well it seems now that christmas is all over and dusted for another year that life returns back to normal.

Had a lovely eventful christmas, which after hearing about other peoples pleases me that it was as it was. By that I mean that other people seem to have had a really shit christmas.

Fair enough, I wasn't able to watch Doctor Who on christmas day because of various reasons and I wasn't able to lay in until 12 liked I had planned. But, it was nice.

I got some lovely presents, Tomb Raider Underworld and the new Prince of Persia game. A couple of books I wanted and some smellys and socks (always welcomed).

Andrew likes his Sais and was completely baffled by the wall holder for them! That was quite funny when he thought I was buying him a fountain! Makes a nice change for me to have kept my gob shut!!

Boxing Day consisted of picking up Mama Young from Peterborough and having dinner round Julie and Steve's. In the evening we went to my brothers in Peterborough where we had tea with my family.

My niece seemed to enjoy her High School Musical Tattoo centre. Andrew and Jody (other brother's girlfriend) both ended up with 2 and my brother Mark ended up with a great big pink G (for Gabriella!!).

Ended up getting home really late and walking home in the freezing temperatures because Andrew's mum needed our car. Was a nice walk home though!

Started back at work yesterday and am really feeling down. Feel like I should take the tree down and delete the christmas songs on my computer.

Going out with Andrew's family for a meal tomorrow night (NYE) and then not sure what we're doing after that. Probably end up round his parents house til midnight.

I was supposed to be going to a party at Mel's place, but I think I'm going to skip it. I don't know anyone and would probably feel a bit uncomfortable in all honesty. I have yet to tell her but then she has had issues with the other half this week. Let's not go there!

Anyway, I'm gonna make a move.

IT'S CHRISTMAS.......EVE

Well happy christmas everyone.

Can you believe that it's already Christmas eve and ole Jesus is celebrating his 2009th birthday!!!

I'm pleased to say that we're all sorted and everything is bought and wrapped.

We swapped presents with Mel last night. She seemed very pleased with the cuddly dog that we bought her and the beer and "personalised" pint glass. Cassie seemed to like her "Decorate your pony" kit. Even though it's for children, adults can enjoy it as well!!

Mel got Andrew some Nun-Chukas (Turtle Power), and she got me this weight loss thing that you attach to your stomach and it electrocutes you! She also got me a Ben 10 DVD game which I can't wait to play!!! I love Ben 10!

Am currently at work and so wish I wasn't. Feel like I need a lay in because I know I'm not going to get one now for a couple of days, not til Saturday at least.

Going to stay round Andrew's family tonight like we do every Christmas. At least this year we have a proper airbed! Previous years have been very uncomfortable!

Christmas Day plans include all of Andrew's grandparents coming over and spending the day there. Boxing Day we are going to pick my mum up and she is having dinner at Andrew's mum and dads. Then we're taking her back so we can all have tea at my brothers.

Am really excited about what presents I'm going to get! :-) Also really hope that other people like thiers. I'm not happy with the fact though that I only have one present for Andrew. I really wanted to get him more. Suppose there isn't much I can do about that right now is there! But I am sure he will like the one thing I have got him!! TURTLE POWER!

Anyway, might do a festive Bitchfest later if I get the time!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

SO READY FOR CHRISTMAS.....

Howdy hoooo.

Well I don't know about anyone else but I'm ready for christmas!!!

Last night I finished wrapping all the presents and everyone is now bought for. The only thing we need to do is to slide a couple of DVDs into the easy case things we bought and we're sorted!!

I was amazed as to how many presents we are actually giving. We have really needed to skimp on christmas this year, but after looking at all the things bought I think that we have done well.

Off to another christmas meal tonight. This time with Holly & Chris. Going to TGI Friday and then going to the cinema to see the ONLY christmas film this year, Four Christmasses.

Have to go to London tomorrow to take my sister their things as well. Not looking forward to that, but that's because she lives in a proper shit part of London, Barking!

I can't believe that this time next week it will all be over. Christmas Day and Boxing Day will be OVER!!! All the hassle getting presents, wrapping them, making nice meals, giving presents, travelling to see family and friends, will all have been done and we will all be getting on trying to pay for christmas!!! Well we will be! Lol!!

Well I'm gonna grab a drink I think and a bar of choc and then get back to work.

CHRISTMAS NEXT WEEK...

Well turns out that my weekend was as good as I'd expected!

Managed to get to Mel's on time last week and got seriously pissed at her christmas party! Was mainly on Sambuca and Whiskey all night! Lol.

Some of the people she works with are well boring and they all seemed to know more about my youtube profile than I did! Was strange!!! Was a good night anyway!

On Saturday we managed to nearly finish our christmas shopping. I think that we only need 2 more presents and then we're done!

Went for a christmas meal with Mel, Andrew, Cassie, Emma, Matt, Eliza and Denny on Saturday at Chiquitos in Cambridge. It was so much fun! The tasks and hats that me and Mel sorted out went down a treat!! The hats were a big hit!!

Eliza did take a load of pics so am hoping they'll be on Facebook soon. :-)

We're going round Mel's for tea tonight. At the moment planning Subway, but I think that I'm gonna try for Pizza Hut. Not had one of them in ages. Would be nice!

Well, I'm leaving the office in 5 minutes to go and give Andrew's family their christmas cards and then go to little Mel's!

Have fun!!

HOPEFULLY A GREAT WEEKEND COMING UP...

Am really looking forward to this weekend! I have loads planned!

As soon as I finish I am driving to Stortford to get Mel and then we're going to Harlow for her christmas do. Then I'm staying round hers. Tomorrow we're going into Cambridge to do some christmas shopping and then we're going to see The Day The Earth Stood Still.

Then straight from there we have another christmas meal with Emma, Matt, Eliza, Denny, Mel & Cassie at Chiquitos in Cambridge.

Have even set some tasks for people to do while we're eating. Me and Mel are getting some prizes tomorrow for people that do them!

Work had the christmas party last night in Amsterdam. They flew everyone across and put them all up in a hotel. As nice as it was, I couldn't go because it would have cost me £150 odd to get my passport sorted.

In a way I was glad I didn't go because people only had about 20/30 minutes to get ready before the party, and needed to get really early flights back today. So everyone has come into work and are tired and hungover!

Was a little disappointed because they didn't do anything for the people that didn't go. Would have been nice, but apparently I was given the choice and I said no. Which is fair enough, but when the 8 of us on customer services didn't go and saved them a fair whack of money, you would have thought that could have treated us to a meal. But it's OK. At least we have a nice big bonus coming our way. That was nice of them!

Anyway, I'm gonna pretend to do some work I think!

JOKES HOKES JOKES

I'm sick of people knocking on my door, begging.

There's just been a woman asking for donations for a sperm bank........

I gave her a right fucking mouthful.

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I had an argument with the wife this morning. She was shouting and foaming at the mouth.
I suppose I shouldn't have put washing powder in her cornflakes.

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Apparently, running into a meeting room and attacking everyone with a stool wasn't what my boss meant when he said I needed to chair a meeting.

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I told her that two cute little kittens ran into my house and chased each other down to my sweety shop basement.

As she ran into the empty cellar I bolted the door shut.

So yes, I am fucking smarter than a ten-year-old.

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My Gran said to me, "Young men of today just aren't as polite and charming as they were when I was young".

I had to explain, "That's because they aren't trying to fuck you now."

TIME FOR A FEMALE...

I thought that as I had put a couple of pics on here of guys that are right up my street, I thought that it was time to put a woman on here!

I was watching TV this evening and while watching Merlin thought that Morgana was gorgeous.

If I was straight then she would so be my cup of tea!!

So, here's Katie McGrath....

I have to say that I think she's extremely pretty and if I was straight then I so would!

RUNNING A BUSINESS.....

I can't believe how any old retard can run a business nowadays!!

As part of working in customer services I have to deal with a lot of people that in a word are pretty stupid. I expect this, I can deal with this.

The public in general are a bit stupid. They keep retards in Big Brother and get rid of the interesting people, they vote for people on social status and break-throughs rather than the ability to do the job in question.

When they call me I expect to have to deal with a stupid person. But what of people that run a business.....?

Now, I don't know about anyone else but I'd expect people who own a business or manage a business to have some common sense. This isn't the case.

Of late I have been helping out in a different department training hotels on our system. No names or companies being mentioned.

It's a very good system and like everything else training is needed. That's where I come into place. I contact them and train them so that everything is OK and mistakes don't happen because they don't know how to use the system.

Today's gripe is that fact that a lot (not all) of the people I train are stupid. They don't follow simple instructions and feel the need to make everything complicated. They seem to turn their brain off and simple things are like rocket science.

The worst thing is they don't seem to think before asking a question!

Anyway, I'm just agitated because of a hotel I "attempted" to train today and need to release some steam.

Feel free to comment.....

ADDING TO THIS:
I have just spoken to another hotel where I needed to explain where the return key was on the keyboard!!

SOME JOKES

My uncle came out of the closet yesterday.

He's not gay, he's got Alzheimer's and thought it was the car.

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I shagged my wifes lipstick last night.....

It was the best Make - Up sex I've ever had.

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A little bit of Monica on the floor...

A little bit of Jessica on the steps....

Mumbai No 5.

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When Barack Obama was performing his speech after being elected as president, he had to do it behind three inch thick bullet-proof glass.

I thought that was a bit harsh - just because he's black doesn't mean he's going to shoot anyone.

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I'm going to go rob a bank tomorrow.
I plan on dressing up in a clown wig and make up and only wearing a thong and nipple tassels.
I'll carry a goat and a can of fluorescent paint in one arm and, while in the bank, I'm going to fuck the goat and throw the paint over the walls, all the time ripping up pages of a phonebook and swearing my head off. After getting the money, I'll take a shit on the floor and piss everywhere. I then will escape in a van shaped like a giant pink cock.

Let's see Crimewatch fucking stage a reconstruction of that.

BITCHFEST.....LEONA LEWIS

Well welcome to the new look Bitchfest.

This is my opportunity to have a go about someone that I don't really like. Usually because I just think they're a whore or a twat and in my eyes that is a good enough reason!

I did create a page on my website for this, but chickened out and took it off. But now it's back and I don't intend for it to go anywhere!

So, for the first new look Bitchfest, Ladies and Gentlemen, I present the whore of all whores (at the moment).......LEONA FUCKING LEWIS!!!!

Look at this slut. If there was ever a reason to turn gay, this fucking woman / thing was it!

The only spirit I wish this bint had was the one that needed to be contacted by a medium!


Doesn't she look like a man in this picture. This is the kind of man that would so turn me straight!


What I wouldn't give for this slapper to keep bloody bleeding!!

This is the outfit she wore when she approached Simon Cowell with asking for him to make her win in exchange for sexual favours. Simon declined and said he'd let her win if she DIDN'T!

Well, that was the first edition of Bitchfest. If this attracts enough attention, then I will surely add some more bints, slappers, whores, twats, knobs & noobs in the future.