My uncle came out of the closet yesterday.
He's not gay, he's got Alzheimer's and thought it was the car.
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I shagged my wifes lipstick last night.....
It was the best Make - Up sex I've ever had.
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A little bit of Monica on the floor...
A little bit of Jessica on the steps....
Mumbai No 5.
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When Barack Obama was performing his speech after being elected as president, he had to do it behind three inch thick bullet-proof glass.
I thought that was a bit harsh - just because he's black doesn't mean he's going to shoot anyone.
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I'm going to go rob a bank tomorrow.
I plan on dressing up in a clown wig and make up and only wearing a thong and nipple tassels.
I'll carry a goat and a can of fluorescent paint in one arm and, while in the bank, I'm going to fuck the goat and throw the paint over the walls, all the time ripping up pages of a phonebook and swearing my head off. After getting the money, I'll take a shit on the floor and piss everywhere. I then will escape in a van shaped like a giant pink cock.
Let's see Crimewatch fucking stage a reconstruction of that.
2 comments:
I love your jokes! Lol maybe you should do the bank robbery thing!! hehe
I wouldn't want a giant cock as a getaway car though, I'd want it as the reward!!!
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